Emphasize the Positive

How we do it:

A spoonful of sugar may help the medicine go down, but kids can also tell when we’re just sugar-coating things. Compliments are great, but shared interests and common goals go further. At PlayGroup, we love what our kids love—and they know it! We take the time to explore their interests with genuine curiosity. We respect what each kid is invested in, and we join them in their pursuits. When we can help support kids in developing their own goals, we build trust to eventually encourage them to try some goals we suggest too.

• Think about something your kid is great at. Maybe it’s video games, or maybe they know a lot of facts about a certain topic. Maybe they are awesome at enjoying dessert, playing with the cat, or finding unusual ways to sit on the couch.

• Give your kid a genuine compliment about their greatness, and ask them to teach you about it. Can you sit upside down on the couch together? Really taste that dessert? Try to stay alive in Minecraft? What is it like? What does your kid love about it? Do they have any tips for you?

• Take what you learn from your kid’s goals, interests, and focus areas to root your future suggestions and feedback. For example:
  

• “You’re so great at taste-testing, I bet that if you learned even more about math, you’d be able to create an awesome recipe! Should we try together?”
  

• “I don’t know anyone who is as good at sitting upside-down as you are! I wanted to talk with you about what happened with your friend, and I was wondering if we could try talking upside-down.”